Yay! Blog! v2.0
Category: What's Going On?

Here's my after-Thanksgiving To Do list (gotta hold myself accountable for these things):

• Christmas Shop
• Balance my checkbook
• Decorate for Christmas
• Christmas Cards
• Backup my computer files
• Work on my vacation pictures

Walking Lily this evening, the moon was almost full and so bright and lit up the cotton clouds all around it. I remembered my coat. I wish I'd remembered my winter hat. At 63 degrees, some would laugh at me for wanting my winter hat.

After the recent passage of a constitutional amendment to ban same sex marriage in Texas, there's a stain on the Texas Constitution and, worse, a stain on the institution of marriage. Marriage is no longer about love and commitment between two people in Texas. It's now some meaningless legal status shared by two people who have the "recognized correct" anatomy.

If I ever get married to a man or a woman, it won't be in Texas.

I got a new do, today. Yay!

Feeling rather self-destructive due to out of whack hormones and an unproductive day so far, I decided to walk 1/2 mile to Starbucks in 98 degree Texas weather for a mocha. Once I got there, though, mocha didn’t sound so hot. Or, more precisely, it sounded too hot. Iced mocha sounded too heavy. So I got an iced passion tea, which is just fine on my diet. On the way back to work, I stopped at a peaceful shady courtyard with a fountain and sat on an old style metal bench for a few minutes respite from the heat. Happy that I survived this diet crisis, I shall now get back to work. Good day.

See more progress on: lose 43 pounds

Lilydawg woke me up at 5:00 a.m. to go outside. We crawled through the dining room window (If you're tuning in late, I don't have a back door) to find that a busy little beaver had dammed up the way to the backyard:



A nervous Lily didn't know what to do with herself. We ended up going for a walk down the street. Diva, the neighbor's chihuahua, was out and took a walk with us. Well... more like a run. She ran circles around us. She's a bundle of concentrated energy.

I got a letter in the mail from my county's jury management office. It said I was scheduled to report for jury duty in November, 2004, but that I never showed up nor did I request a postponement or excuse. It said they'd rescheduled me for July.

At the end of the letter, it said failure to appear may result in a mandatory appearance before the judge and a fine of up to $1000.

Damn.

It's true that I never showed up, but that's because I did the impaneling over the internet. They assigned me to a jury panel by email and told me to call each day to see if I needed to report. After a few days, the recording said my panel had been excused and thanked me.

Luckily, I kept all the emails and the original jury summons with a note about when I did the internet impaneling.

I called the jury office and told the lady who answered that I got a letter saying I failed to report for jury duty. She asked for my juror number and said I was excused from the July jury duty. Simple as that.

Maybe it's just a psych job. Or a glitch in the system. I don't know, but I hope they don't show up and arrest me next December for not showing up in July.

I'm feeling better today. I'm still having debates with phantoms in my head, but it's not as bad. I feel like the phantoms are listening with respect now.

Oddly enough, I slept the night through last night. I forgot to set my alarm before I fell asleep, but I woke up on time anyway. Whew!

I think I slept better for two reasons:

• I walked around the neighborhood for twenty minutes after dinner. Exercise always does me good. I should have done it again tonight, but I worked late.
• I did not eat a piece of the chocolate raspberry truffle cake that's in my fridge. I shouldn't have eaten a piece tonight, but it tastes so good.

I'm disappointed Vonzell got kicked off American Idol tonight. Carrie can sing, but she doesn't have as much personality. Vonzell will definitely get a CD deal, though, so that's not the last of her. I just hope she records a genre of music I like.

Random Thought: I like Mimosas (orange juice and champagne), but I don't like to drink often, so I make virgin mimosas with orange juice and seltzer water. Yum!

Work is a bit bipolar at the moment. On one hand, it's the most exciting time because we're in the homestretch of a big project that's turning out amazing (at least I think so). I don't think I better talk about the other hand.

It's got me down, though. It's got my mind going 90 miles an hour all the time, having debates with phantoms in my head. It's times like these that I can't concentrate well on important things. Like driving. When I had my wreck 3 years ago, I was in one of those debating-phantoms-in-my-head moments, ran a red light, and slammed into a VW Jetta. Hopefully, my awareness of the situation this time is enough to avoid trouble like that.

I haven't slept a whole night through in a while. I'd love some good drugs to help with that. I don't want to be a zombie, though.

It's crazy how when one thing is bothering you, all your other demons come to life. I wish several times a day that I had someone to come home to.

I made deviled eggs tonight. It didn't help keep my mind off things, but they sure are tasty.

I was at the tail end of a nap on the couch yesterday. I'd already woken up, but I was having a hard time getting up. Then I heard a series of quick clicks behind me that sounded like the kitty cat disturbing the vertical blinds. Lily barked at the noise.

I looked over and saw the cat on the back of the couch, so I knew it wasn't him. The blinds looked normal, too.

A short while later, I went to the computer to check what was going on in the cyber world, and found a black screen. After turning my desktop off and on a few times with no change, I hooked my laptop up to the monitor to see if it was a monitor problem. Yep. It just went kablooey, I guess.

I'd been wanting a new flat panel, so I wasn't devastated. It couldn't have happened at a better time, too... Saturday evening when I don't have anywhere to be on Sunday.

I spent about an hour agonizing over monitors at CompUSA. I don't know anything about buying flat panel monitors. I ended up getting the cheapest 19 inch, an Envision brand.

I got it home and found out I can't make it go to a higher resolution than 1280 x whatever. Waaaaaaa! Photographs don't look crisp and beautiful like I'm used to seeing on my old monitor.

So today, I'm agonizing over taking it back. Do I stick with the cheap model and complain a lot for the next however many years I have it, or do I put out the cash and be happy with the quality? I'll probably take it back.

I looked online this morning, and found out the monitor I bought yesterday is $50 cheaper today than it was yesterday. I'll at least go back and get a credit for that.

When I picked LilyDawg up from play day, she was Stinky Dawg. Now that she's had a spontaneous bath, she smells like Wet Dawg. I hope she hurries up and smells like Had-a-Bath-Today Dawg.

The cat disappeared at the first sound of the bath running.

Now it's time for carrot/apple/bell pepper juice, meatloaf, caramel ice cream and American Idol. Yay! for Nikko Smith... you go, boy!!

• If I have a nosey neighbor, he or she could be gossiping about how I was home all week with red eyes. Perhaps I got fired and now I just stay home and get high. Or maybe someone died, and I've spent the week crying.
• I went to the store after dinner to buy apples and tortillas. I walked around with sunglasses on so people wouldn't think I was crying or high.
• Pink Eye makes me remember one reason I don't like to get high. I can't stand the way it makes my eyes feel.
• If I'd known I would be home all week, I'd have ordered some junk over the internet that I had to sign for. Like some accessories for my new cell phone.
• I went out back with Lily this morning and heard a Cardinal singing overhead. I didn't think I'd be able to see him, but even with my filmy eyes, I was able to find the bright red spot among the branches. That Cardinal always makes me smile.
• Being home all week, I had a lot of time to catch up on "Alias." I'm current now. Sadly, I'm a little burnt out on not knowing who to trust and who's really dead. I'll get over it. My favorite character/actor was Lena Olin in the second season. Too bad she's not on the show anymore.
• This probably sounds weird, but I sure miss going to work.

I'm back from a trip to Houston for my sister-in-law's 50th birthday party. I had a great time. Super company and food.

I came home to hundreds of comment spams that had been force moderated even though they had blacklisted strings in their text. They should have been rejected outright. I also had several trackback spams that got through that should have been rejected. I'm discontinuing all trackbacks now. I only get a few legitimate ones anyway. Sorry to those of you who trackback me. Blame the damn spammers.

My allergies are kicking my butt, and the weather is awful.

I guess things could be worse.

When I got home from work tonight, the kids in my neighborhood had a lost beagle. They said they tried to catch another lost beagle, but it ran into someone's back yard. A girl said she heard a man yelling bad words at the dog. She thought he was hitting the dog, too.

The guy wasn't home when I got there, but he drove up a little while later, and I asked him if he'd seen a beagle. He said he'd seen two. I told him the kids said one went into one of the backyards. He said that one went in his backyard, but he already drove it out. Bastard.

A boy wanted to keep the dog they caught. He said his mom said it was okay. The dog had tags with an address and phone number, but he said he wasn't going to call. I memorized the number and went home and called. I told the guy some kids had one of his dogs and the other one was out, but we didn't know where it went.

A little bit later, I saw a truck drive up and a guy got the one dog. I hope he didn't tell the kids a lady called him because now they'll hate me.

It's just not right for someone to keep a dog that has tags.

I hope the other one is okay. Sometimes people wonder why I won't leave Lilydawg in my backyard during the day. I don't ever want her to get out and come across someone who will yell obscenities at her and possibly hit her if she got scared and ran in their backyard. It makes me sick.

Car trouble makes me cry.

My car is idling too low and stalling if I'm not careful. I've been lucky as I've had my car for 2.5 years with no trouble at all.

The reason car trouble makes me cry is because it reminds me of two things:

• My Dad's not around to help me with stuff like this anymore.
• I don't have a special person in my life to help me with the logistics when I have this kind of problem.

Luckily, the dealership service department has a pretty flexible drop off time range (7:00 a.m. - 10:00 a.m.) and a shuttle that takes people to work from 7:45 to 10:30. I have to find a way back to the dealership after work, but there are plenty of nice people at work who can probably take me. Even if none of them can, I don't have a problem calling a cab.

I think I'll finally get a cell phone this week. I'd hate for my car to break down and not be able to call an auto service for help.

Thanks to everyone for all the kind words. I'm back from Oklahoma. Aunt Bea's funeral was both lovely and sad. I'm looking forward to getting back into a routine. I feel lost when I lose my routine.

I have lots of pictures from the trips to Fort Worth and Oklahoma, but I'm not feeling up to doing anything with them right now. All I want to do is clean house, do laundry, watch TV, eat and sleep. Mostly eat.

Later Gators.

With my cousin's wedding this weekend, I'll be real busy with family. I might not have much time to write. If not, I'll talk to you at the end of the weekend. Think of me while I'm wearing the torture devices (dress and panty hose).

My friend's son was in this firefight in Haditha. Thankfully, he was not one of the 4 marines who died.

This might sound like a rant, but I'm actually amused. I set my trash can out at the curb Sunday night for the Monday pickup. The trash men have those trucks with arms that grab the cans and raise them up and empty them into the top of the truck. I love that idea... I'll bet it saves lots of money on worker's comp injuries.

When I got home after work Monday, there was a pre-printed note sticking up from the handle of the trash can. It said, "We Apologize" and had a bevy of reasons why they wouldn't pick up trash with one checked off that applied to my trash that day. It said a car was blocking the can.

I understand the truck arms couldn't get to my can if a car was blocking it, but someone had to have walked over and put the note on the can. The can has wheels... couldn't he/she roll the can out from behind the car so the truck arms could reach it?

After I read the note, I threw it directly into the can. Now I kinda wish I'd kept it out to read all the other reasons they might not pick up trash. I guess I could go dig it out.

Naw.

Lily just took me out for a walk. The sun's not up yet, and I can see 5 planets in the sky. There are six up there, but I can't make out Pluto. I picked out Venus, Jupiter and Saturn myself. Then I checked My Stars Live to verify that I was right. That showed me that Mercury is the bright spot hanging out with Venus, and Mars isn't too far away from them in Scorpio. Saturn has been hanging out with the Gemini twins for a couple of months. It's so fascinating.

I have a wedding to go to at the end of the month. The last wedding I went to was my brother's. That was pretty cool. That was when my Dad was still alive, too.

The wedding before that was around 10 years ago. The bride and groom were a couple of auditors with whom I worked. I caught the bouquet at that wedding--proof positive that catching the bouquet means abso-freakin-lutely nothing.

Tonight I checked to see if I could wear something I already own. I only have one somewhat formal dress. Last time I wore it was to my Dad's funeral 5 years ago. That's also the last time I saw my cousin who will be the bride. Something tells me it would be better to buy a new dress for her wedding, but I never wear dresses, so I hate to buy another one. Turns out this one still fits. I can't decide whether to be happy I have the option of wearing it, or sad that all the dieting I've done in the last 5 years and resulted in no change. I'll be happy... Meryl Streep says it's easier that way.

I'm invited to the rehearsal dinner. I've never been to a rehearsal dinner. It's classy casual attire. I can do that easily. I think.

The reception is the scary part of the whole affair. The only people I really know are my aunt and my cousins, and they're all part of the wedding party. This is an occasion that I really wish I had someone to go with me. I don't want to socialize with people I don't know. Especially if they're all getting drunk.

I'll take my camera. If things get awkward, I can probably hide behind that.

This weekend I'll need to buy a wedding gift and some panty hose. Wedding gifts are painless because of the registry. Panty hose should be included in the master list of torture devices just above slips. Thank goodness my dress has a built in liner and doesn't require a slip.

I'm off work until Monday, and I'm determined to not waste my days.

Today I'm going on a day trip to Hamilton's Pool to hike and take pictures. There's another small park in the vicinity that I might go to depending on how long the Hamilton's Pool trip takes. Tonight, I'll finish processing my Christmas pictures and process whatever pictures I take on my outing. There are two Big 12 teams competing in bowl games, too.

Tomorrow, I think I'll do something musical. I haven't picked up my guitar in months. Planning to write a song is probably a little too ambitious, but you never know. I think I'll go out to a real restaurant and treat myself to a good meal, too (perhaps my favorite Austin restaurant, Romeos). In the evening, I can cheer on the Texas Tech Red Raiders against the Cal Bears.

Friday is still open. Perhaps some shopping. Given that it's New Year's Eve, and that's always the hardest holiday for me, maybe some new Nikes or a new flat panel monitor will help keep me out of the doldrums. It's my last chance to see the Sun Devils play this year, too.

I might save the weekend for regular weekend stuff... grocery shopping, cleaning house, etc. Saturday is the last full day of football for many months, so I'll definitely take advantage of that. Hook 'em, Horns!

I've been haunted by a couple of ex-boyfriend/dates/whatever in the last few days. I heard some disturbing news that I won't go into out of respect for the parties involved, but it brought back all the anger I felt about the way my last boyfriend treated me. If you've been visiting here a while, you know he started seeing someone else without telling me and just kinda disappeared from the relationship. I found out about the other woman later. Saturday night I dreamed that he sent me an email. It would be the first I'd heard from him since January. He attached a document with the story of how he met the other lady with lots of pictures of them being happy together. I woke up feeling slapped. He's had some really bad stuff happen to him over the last week, so no comments kicking him while he's down. This is about me processing this stuff.

The bad news put a cloud over my whole weekend and is another reason why I threw myself into the Movable Type upgrade I did on Saturday. I tend to bury myself in my web site when things aren't quite right with my world. Well... I bury myself in my website when things are right, too.

Then this morning, I saw another ex-date at Starbucks. In the flesh. I'm not sure if he recognized me. I barely recognized him. I was standing right behind him in line. I remember him as this skinny guy, but he's filled out. Maybe he's doing circuit training or something. He had more gray in his hair, although he was prematurely gray before. He had the same mannerisms as he took his keys out of his pocket and dropped them back in. And the way he held his portfolio was very much like my ex-date would have. But I didn't *know* it was him until I heard his nasal voice when he ordered his coffee.

This is the guy who told me he didn't want to date me anymore because I wasn't thin enough. Gotta admire him for his honesty, but definitely not for his tact.

One thing about the "you're too fat" break up guy that's good is that he inspired parts of at least two songs. One of the most famous (in my small circle) lines from one of my songs goes:

I said, "Love is nothing for you to decide
Love is natural
If you've gotta think about it for a while
Your heart is cynical"

That was very loosely inspired by him. And, oddly enough, was a favorite lyric of the other ex-boyfriend.

I don't think I have any other exes with whom I've experienced unforgiven hurtful splits. Splits are never easy, of course, but the rest were amiable. Hopefully seeing the one guy at Starbucks was a fluke. Otherwise, I'll have to start going to a different Starbucks.

I'm finally feeling better. It's been 2.5 weeks since I first got the creeping crud. Today was the first day I felt like my energy level was back up to par. I've got my speaking voice back. My singing voice is still suffering. My fear is that I got this so early in the season that I might get it again. I hope not!

Maybe this weekend I'll start my evening walks again. I got the little camera I ordered a few weeks back. I'll write about it soon (with pictures!). It'll be great to have a little camera with me on my walks. I'll take pictures of kitties and doggies and houses I like and that mailbox made out of an outboard boat motor I've always wanted to photograph.

I went back to work today. I'm feeling better, but I still have a cough, congestion and I've lost my voice. I found Brenda Vaccaro's voice, though. So Brenda... if you want your voice back, call me, hon.

I worked 9.5 hours, and I think I might go in for a few hours tomorrow. Only thing I'm concerned about is that one of the Austin City Limits Music Festival venues is close to where I work, and they're using our parking lot for parking. It'll cost me $5. Blah... paying $5 to go to work on a Saturday. But I want to work, so I'll probably do it.

I'm having canned soup for dinner. I took it out of the can and heated it up, though. Progresso has jumped on the Low Carb bandwagon. Whooot! I'm having Tuscan Meatball soup. I'm so glad... most soups have potatoes, carrots or both, and I don't eat those things. Well, sometimes I do, but still.

I decided to watch Survivor this season. I haven't watched a full season since the first one. It was weird... when they got to the end and they voted someone off, I was like, "Who the hell is that?" I either wasn't paying much attention, or the person was extremely nondescript.

That is all.

I went to work today. I was feeling pretty good this morning, but it went downhill from there. I'm still sick, and not only that... I'm sicker than yesterday. The creeping crud has creeped into my chest where it's making me cough. It hurts. My nose is running, too, which is so icky. Luckily, toilet paper was on sale a couple weeks ago, and I bought a buttload (pun intended). I can use that to sop up the leakage in my nose.

I doubt I'll feel well enough to go to work tomorrow. Poop. Poop and a half, even.

I'm still suffering from the creeping crud. I stayed home from work today. I feel a little better this evening, but this junk keeps morphing. It hasn't gotten into my chest yet. Let's hope it stays away.

So today I slept and watched TV and drank apple juice and water all day. I miss taking my evening walk. Come to think of it... everytime I get started on an exercise routine, illness intervenes. I'd make the joke that I'm allergic to exercise, but I don't really believe that.

I hope I feel much better tomorrow. I want to go back to work.

This weekend hasn't been the best. If you stopped by my blog yesterday morning or afternoon, you know it was messed up. My web host decreased my web space limit below what I'm using, and it screwed up the rebuild process on my blogs. Since the billing people aren't there on the weekends, we're not sure if something got screwed up with a payment, or if they screwed something up when they did some maintenance. Doesn't matter... they re-established my previous space limit and the billing people will look at things Monday.

One good thing that came from that... it got me kick started working on my photo album from my trip to Portland since I couldn't fart around on my blogs. I got all the pictures processed, so I just need to put the pages together.

Friday night, I had the worst headache I've had in a while. Turns out it was a precursor to a constantly morphing cold or flu or virus or whatever. Today, I have an awful sore throat. I think steam comes out of my ears everytime I swallow. How come sore throats hurt 5 times worse when one is laying down (or is that lying down)? Hey... that's two questions in one!

I know things could be a lot worse, but I had to get the complaining out. I feel a little better now.

I did pretty well on the college football pool this week. I picked 10 out of 16 games correctly against the spread. Whooot! That was good for a 12 way tie for third place. My share of the pot is just over $3. That's more than I made all last year.

Even better than winning $3, though, is the Longhorns beating the Razorbacks. Yay! Hook 'em 'Horns!!

I've got stuff to do this weekend, but it's mostly stuff I've had to do for a while that I just don't get done. Here's the rundown (mostly for my own reference as I make my way through the weekend):

• Design some promo stuff for the upcoming Freeaudioplayer compilation CD
• archive stuff on my hard drive
• clean up my PC desktop
• acquire and install a second hard drive
• make a photo album with the pictures from my Portland trip last May
• make CDs for the brykMan
• make a CD for Lynn
• put a new CD together to sell at CDBaby
• clean out my car
• go through my emails and answer/delete/archive as needed
• watch stuff on TiVo
• watch football
• clean my garage some
• do my FlyLady missions from this week
• walk at least a mile each day
• rip mp3s from my CD collection
• make CDs from the songs I've purchased at iTunes

There's probably more stuff. I'm thinking about going to see a movie, too... in the theater. *GASP* Since there are no more Lord of the Rings movies coming out, I guess I better get myself back in the swing of seeing other kinds of movies. I'm considering Wicker Park. It's gotten mixed reviews. One reviewer said it's hard to define the genre of movie, but in the end you find it's a real romance. That intrigued me.

Today is all about cleaning and organizing. My house is a mess. The first thing I'm going to do is go through the back log of FlyLady Missions I have in my mailbox. One of her crew sends an email each day Monday through Friday and gives us a 15 minute cleaning/organizing mission. I haven't done any for 3 weeks.

Then I'll do whatever else needs doing. Vacuuming, cleaning the bathroom counter, water the plants, etc.

There are a couple of things I need to stop procrastinating: cleaning out the garage and making the back bathroom useable again. I won't get to those today, though.

I'm looking forward to cleaning. I need to move around, and I love to relax in a clean house when it's all done.

On Friday, I posted about how much I love my job sometimes. Today was one of those days I didn't love my job. One reason is because I messed up some things, so it's partly my own fault. I posted a wrong deadline date on our website for something. Gak!

But another reason I don't love my job so much is because I've got to try to make our entire website consistent. It's a tough job, because we have other people who are responsible for the content in different sections and they want to control all aspects of the pages they manage. When I try to institute a consistent treatment of something across the whole site, it ruffles feathers.

I'm working out some procedures to address this stuff, but it takes time. I didn't get to work on programming my fun java application until 4:00 p.m. Then at 5:00 p.m., the program I use to write code had a fatal error, and I lost some of my work. Boo Hoo. So I stayed until 5:30 redoing some stuff. Hopefully tomorrow, I'll get to work on the fun stuff all day without mishap. I'm crossing my fingers.

I was so into my job today, that I didn't want to leave at 5:00. I wanted to stay and work on the little application I'm programming in java. It's an interest calculator.

In Texas state government, we have to pay our vendors interest if we pay them more than 30 days after we get their invoice or they deliver the goods/services (whichever is later). It used to be a straight 12 percent, but when the economy hit the crapper, the legislature decided to base the interest rate on the prime rate. I don't know the exact formula... I just have to pull the interest rate from a database table that someone else maintains.

My calculator will calculate the number of days a payment is late and do the interest calculation. It'll also calculate the 30 day due date if the person doesn't want to count that him/herself.

It's so fun! Yay!

I've had some great mail come my way lately. Today, I got a six bottles of Torani syrup.

• Watermelon
• Black Cherry
• White Chocolate
• English Toffee YUM!!!
• Chocolate
• Raspberry

I also got the new Lori McKenna CD, "Bittertown." She's one of my favorite songwriters and singers.



On Friday, I got a box of checks I ordered with Lily's picture on them. They're so cool!!

Then I got a new webcam. It's a Creative NX Pro. Here's a sample:



I also got some nasty bills in the mail. Bleh. But I guess you can't usually have good mail days without getting a nasty bill in the mail at some point. heh!

Sunday weigh-in: PZ -15 LW +1 (lost 15 pounds total, gained 1 pound since last weigh-in)

I didn't post a weigh-in last week, but I hadn't lost or gained anything. This week, things are moving again.

I've run out of Portland trip journal posts, so I guess I'll have to start thinking of new things to say. I'm still revamping my entire website to make it accessible to people who use assistive technologies. Right now I'm working on my song pages. I think when that's done, all that's left is my blog and making alternate skins.

I made myself stop sitting at the computer for about an hour last night. I put Stephen King's "Storm of the Century" DVD on and sat down on the couch to watch it. But then the bad guy scared me, and I decided I shouldn't watch a scary movie that close to bedtime. Gak.

Sunday weigh-in: PZ -14 LW +2 (lost 14 pounds total, gained 2 pounds since last weigh-in)

I am up 2 pounds since I weighed 2 weeks ago. But that's a good thing. Last week, when I got back from my trip to Portland, I was up 7 pounds! So really, I'm down 5 pounds. heh!

I just got back from the store where I stocked up on good food like pork chops, strawberries, and tomatoes. I also finally remembered to get batteries for my flashlight. I didn't remember whether it took C or D batteries, though, so I got both. Ended up to be D. I put them in the flashlight, and it works so good now!

Let's all applaud brykMantra for being named Blog o' the Week over at Y'all Blog. Y'all Blog focuses on happenings and other things in the Dallas/Ft. Worth area. You can count on brykMantra to update every day and to bring a chuckle or two to your day. Yay! brykMantra!

There are men all around my duplex building a fence. I have my webcam pointed at my gate right now. So if anyone wants to see men building a gate, take a look.

I just got back from Portland, Oregon, and boy did I miss the Texas heat. Not!

Yay! I'll have trip journal entries that I wrote on the road soon and pictures to go with them. I didn't do a lot of sightseeing as it was a trip to visit with my Aunts and Uncle, but I still took a boatload of pictures. I just need to get them off the boat.

I have a few dream journal entries to post, too... I had some weird dreams in Oregon three nights in a row. Stay tuned...

The good thing about getting up early on Sunday morning to go to the grocery store to buy the things I forgot to buy on Saturday is that I still have time to go to the grocery store again Sunday evening to buy the things I forgot to buy Sunday morning.

Sunday weigh-in: PZ -16 LW -2 (lost 16 pounds total, lost 2 pounds since last week)

Just goes to show... if I diet seriously, I lose weight. Yay!

I didn't sleep well last night. All I could think of was ticks. Ugh. I did have a dream, but there wasn't that much to it. Here's what I remember:



I have to go to the grocery store again today. That's a nice thing about going to the grocery on Saturday. I have an extra day to go back to buy all the things I forgot or didn't realize I needed. Like dog biscuits and liquid dish soap.

Hi Karlyn!

I didn't have time to post yesterday because I went to a conference on open source software. It was interesting. There are some who are religious-style fanatics about open source software, which kinda made me think it's the best thing since pay at the pump gas. But really, it's just another option. There are good things and bad things about it, and the solution for any particular state agency's needs could be open source or proprietary. It just depends on a lot of factors. Don't worry... I'm not going to get into them... *BORING*

Then I had to rush home for the party at Ampcast that is Jon Solo's Happy Hour radio show. Then there were several other radio shows. I didn't leave the chatroom until after 1:00 a.m.! It was fun!

Today, I was busy burning CDs and making inserts for Kymberlie's Spring Burn It! CD swap. Got 'em all done. Now I just need to mail 'em!

Joan of Arcadia was awesome this week. And next week, the season finale, looks very intriguing. I'm already planning to get the DVD set of season I if they put one out.

Yay! It was a great mail day!

I got 3 CDs:

Heart - Dog & Butterfly
Heart - Dreamboat Annie
Kasey Chambers - The Captain

Those Heart CDs take me back to my second year in college. They came out before then, but that was the year I discovered how great the whole albums were. I remember listening to Dreamboat Annie over and over.

Kasey Chambers is a new discovery. I love her light raspy voice.

I also got a cassette from Frank Cotolo. He wrote a couple of songs and wants me to record them. They're cool... very folky. I've got another song to record this weekend, but when I'm finished with that, I'll start learning Frankie's songs.

I had another surprise that had nothing to do with mail. I opened the window to let Lily out into the backyard, and my backyard had tripled in size! The duplex next door is empty, and someone removed the fence!! I guess they're replacing it before new people move in. It was really weird!! It made me cry a little because I felt what it would be like to have a big backyard. I've never really yearned for one, but standing out there in that giant space made me yearn bigtime.

Lily didn't know what to do with herself!!

Speaking of Lily... it's time for her evening walk...

I just got an email from my coworker. It said,

"Please bring your own damn juggling balls to work. You can't keep
stealing mine every time you have the urge to juggle.

Thank you."

Sunday weigh-in: PZ -14 LW -2 (lost 14 pounds total, lost 2 pound since last week)

Yesterday, I kept having weird anxiety attacks. I have them every once in a while and usually at night. The first time I really noticed them was when I was in Arizona on vacation last August/September. I'd wake up in the middle of the night at the hotel feeling hot on the inside, cold on the outside and dizzy.

Yesterday was the worst I've had. I had several strong ones during the day. When it happens, I become painfully aware of my surroundings. This is very hard to explain... it's almost like I wonder how I got where I am. Like in a dream where you don't know where you are, but you know it's where you live. I dunno... strange.

I also saw a commercial jet fly low overhead while I was walking Lily. It was headed for the airport. It made me cry. I got that kind of feeling, too, when I was in Arizona and saw planes go overhead, but it never made me cry. It just made me feel a strong sense of emotion.

If I had to guess what it's all about, I think it's because I'm not where I want to be in my life. I want to be somewhere else... both physically and in terms of, well, living.

Anyway... I feel a little better so far today. Probably because the sun's out. Now if this chill would just leave the air, the weather would be perfect. Who let Jack Frost out to make things chilly again, anyway?

Sunday weigh-in: PZ -12 LW -1 (lost 12 pounds total, lost 1 pound since last week)

I'm back to my lowest Sunday weight before I spent that week a while back cheating like crazy. Yay!

Today is all about grocery shopping and making music. Before I get started on that, though, I need to empty the dishwasher, make some lunch and take Lily for a walk... seems like there's always a whole list of things to do before I can start on my list of things to do!!

Happy Sunday!!!

Sunday weigh-in: PZ -11 LW -1 (lost 11 pounds total, lost 1 pound since last week)

The weekend has flown by. I hate that. Yesterday, I got up and cooked some breakfast. Then I took a long walk in my neighborhood. When I left the house, it was cloudy and a little dark, and I thought I might get rained on. But as I got farther from my house, it got brighter until the sun was shining on me. Then as I started coming back closer to my house, it got darker again. I guess the darkness was over my house. heh!

I recorded vocals for a song yesterday and some talking for a couple of Ampcast radio show shoutouts. I put the shoutouts together today. One for is TommyGoober's new show, Vortex Radio, and one is for Robby and Karen's show, Radio RKOhhh! Shoutouts are fun!

Today I cleaned my bathroom real good, did some laundry and went grocery shopping. Typical Sunday stuff. Now I need to pick up some of this clutter and run the vacuum. Lily's shedding for the summer!

I got a new webcam this week. It's better than my old one, but I'm struggling to get it just right. My perfectionism is driving me nutso!! There are soooo many variables that I can't get my head around what to do to make it less grainy. There's lighting and focus and a multitude of controls in the software. Ugh. I need to let it go and just be happy with it the way it is.

Sunday weigh-in: PZ -10 LW +2 (lost 10 pounds total, GAINED 2 pounds since last week)

Gaining two pounds over the last week isn't a surprise. I was a bad girl. There was a dulce de leche cheesecake bar, chicken tenders, french fries with ranch dressing, fudge pie, and a pitcher of margaritas. Ugh. But I'm back on my diet now.

I might go buy a guitar today that I fell in love with on Friday when I dropped off my little bass to get fixed. It's raining, though, and that really discourages me from going out. We'll see... if I get it, I'll post a picture.

And it looks like my all-time favorite blogger has arisen from the dead. Yay!!

I just got back from running errands. I took my baby Ashbory bass to South Austin Music to get it fixed. It has a short in it. It'll be cool when it's fixed because then I can sit and listen to the Ampcast radio shows and play bass along with the music.

I also went to Walmart. I needed to buy some panties and baby powder. The baby powder is for the strings on my Ashbory bass. One of them snapped the other night because I haven't been taking good care to keep the strings powdered.

Of course, I usually can't go to Walmart and walk out with only the things I went in for. Today I ended up with a table fan for my bedroom, toothpaste, two necklaces, and some makeup. It wasn't a painful trip like Walmart usually is. I guess because it's Friday and many people have to work.

I've got lots to do the rest of the day. I need to clean my kitchen, work on my website, update the Strange Sandwich Music site, and update the jukebox on the Freeaudioplayer bulletin board.

I also need a nap, and I'd love to catch up on some of my TV shows. It's a good thing it's a three day weekend. Waddya wanna bet I don't get it all done, though...

It's 7:30 a.m., and it's storming. The thunder set off a car alarm a few minutes ago. I'm at home eating a bowl of fruit listening to Warren Von Kruck of Soul Shake sing "You Don't Have To Run."

The rain keeps getting harder. I don't want to drive to work in this. I'm going to hang out a little longer and hope it stops. Meanwhile, I'll chill out with my honeydew melon, papaya and pineapple.

Sunday weigh-in: PZ -10 LW -1 (lost 10 pounds total, 1 pound since last week)

Today is dedicated to errands and chores. Laundry, vacuuming, sweeping, scrubbing, grocery shopping...

I've got a few movies I've watched, but haven't written about, too. Maybe I'll write about one of them today. I seem to not have as much time to write as I used to. Probably all the time I spend at the Ampcast chat room. I haven't read a book in ages either. I need to get a better handle on how I spend my time.

I thought the time was supposed to change last night, but I guess it'll change next weekend. I'm not looking forward to that... it means it'll still be dark when I get up in the morning. There oughta be a law...

So anyway... Happy Sunday!!

Sunday weigh-in: PZ -9 LW -0 (lost 9 pounds total, 0 pounds since last week)

Well... my lack of weight loss this week is not surprising given the giant schnitzel I ate at lunch Thursday and the trip to Starbucks yesterday. But I'm still committed to the diet, and that's what matters.

I'm doing well in the CrabAppleLane March Madness Pool. Yay! I've always loved March Madness, and it's even more fun when there's a pool. Thanks to Rob for the invitation to participate!

After a plugin mishap with my Cakewalk program (probably due to my upgrade to XP a while back), we've passed all the tracks for the song I'm doing with Boogaboo on to Adam Kittle and Robby James Rabuck. I've never liked doing the production work, so I'm just going to relax and let the experts do their thing. Thanks, guys!

Time for breakfast and basketball and grocery shopping...

Sunday weigh-in: PZ -9 LW -1 (lost 9 pounds total, 1 pound since last week)

Whew, good news... rapid weight loss has been stalled, but weight loss just the same.

It's been a pretty productive weekend so far. I sat down in the kitchen yesterday and cleaned the pantry floor really well. It was a mess. Ick. But now I'm not scared of my pantry.

Speaking of scared... is anyone else still scared of the monster under the bed?

In other news... I think the song I'm doing with boogaboo is finished. Dennyvan is going to debut it on his Thursday night Old Time Radio show. Yay! It should be available for downloading on Friday.

My grocery store *finally* started carrying raspberry and grape Diet Rite. I didn't need anymore today, but I bought some anyway to show them there's a demand. heh!

Tonight's dinner menu includes Creamed Beef Florentine. That's ground sirloin, onion, spinach, heavy cream, pepper and parmesan cheese. I've never had it before, but it sounded pretty good. The recipe says, "It's quite delicious, but admittedly a bit odd looking."

That's what I like... odd looking cuisine that tastes delicious.

On Sunday, I went to the grocery store. It wasn't crowded, but the mission of every person in there was to block the food I wanted to put into my cart. There were a couple of ladies with a kid who were probably the leaders of the mission. Except their job wasn't to block the food I wanted, but to block entire aisles while the others got in place in other aisles. They had a kid with them, so they were pushing the cart that has a toy car attached big enough to hold the kid. Between the ladies and the kid car cart, it was quite difficult to pass.

Halfway through my shopping, I decided to break my routine, and go to the other end of the store in hopes to get away from the aisle blocking ladies. I skipped probably 10 aisles. Halfway down the aisle, here come the ladies again. Gak!

The other people would just watch for me to get near them and then hover around the chicken or the milk or whatever else was next on my shopping list.

Needless to say, I had a major case of shopping cart rage.

Over the last several weeks, there's been a muddy patch at the side of my duplex. I didn't think *too* much of it when it started because it was raining off and on for a week or so. During the times it stopped, everything would dry up except that one muddy patch.

It was in a bad place, too... I had to jump over it to get to the backyard. LilyDawg could jump over it fine, but, most of the time, I'd end up with a mud caked shoe. I'm surprised I never ended up with a muddy butt!

So a couple nights ago, LilyDawg got me up to go potty at 3:30 a.m. I went outside with her, but being dark, I didn't want to risk trying to jump the puddle. I stood next to it and studied it with my flashlight. The weird thing is, it was a bigger puddle than I remembered the day before. Yet... we hadn't had any rain.

Then I heard it. A slight trickling noise on the other side of the fence.

Being the middle of the night, I decided not to go investigate. But yesterday evening, I took a trip over there. The neighbors moved out a couple weeks ago, so I felt comfortable walking back there.

I found a garden hose pointed directly under my fence with the water running. There wasn't even a muddy patch in their yard.

Sunday weigh-in: PZ -8 (that means I've lost 8 pounds)

Egads... I didn't mean to lose that much so fast. I don't want to melt so fast on the inside that I sag on the outside. I need to start exercising more. And maybe add some more carbo meals to my meal plan.

I wanted to see if I could record a song real quick today, but I couldn't figure out the chords. DRAT! I hate that I can't learn songs by ear. I searched the internet for chords, but to no avail.

So I'll go back to being Suzy Homemaker and make a grocery list and go shopping. I need fruit!!

Over the last year and a half at work, I've been involved in a programming project. It's a web application that will allow security coordinators at Texas state agencies to request access for various systems for their employees. We have yet to come up with a name for it. The key to naming an application is to make it have a great acronym, but we can never settle on one. I think it's because it's too much fun to put our heads together every month and brainstorm silly acronyms. You know, like:

• SCARS (security coordinator access request system)
• FEAR (facility for entering access requests)
• CARP (comptroller access request program)
• EARS (electronic access request system)
• ARSE (application for requesting secured entry)

The one we would actually like to use is SARS (security access request system), but that durn SARS disease will probably keep us from getting it approved. Poo.

Happy Texas Independence Day!

On this day in 1836, the Texas Declaration of Independence was signed. Meanwhile, there was a battle raging at the Alamo in San Antonio. The Alamo fell on March 6th, and boy were the Texans pissed. To make matters worse, James Fannin and nearly 400 other Texans were executed by the Mexican Army on March 27th. You know what they say... Don't Mess With Texas! So after some more battles and stuff, Sam Houston kicked Santa Ana's tail at San Jacinto near my hometown of Houston. Our independence was won!

This history lesson brought to you by Lone Star Junction.

It's funny... back when I *had* to learn Texas history, I couldn't care less. But now it's kinda cool.

The DJ from FM-Selfpit is playing Breathe in his on-demand internet radio show right now. That's pretty darn cool. He speaks in Japanese. Download the WMA file and give it a listen if you have a chance. He's got links to all the artists at the bottom of the page if you hear something you like.

Speaking of "Breathe," Peppermint Tina asked how we chose the name Raspberry Silk for our band. Milo noticed that I like raspberry scented and flavored things. Or as he would spell it... "flavoured." So the raspberry part came from that. The silk part came from a conversation we had about sexual content in song lyrics. I said that I probably wouldn't sing a song that was straight out sexual. You know, like... "C'mon baby, I wanna hump you all night long." I'd rather sing something more subtle and sensual. He replied something about "like a rustle of silk?" That summed it up. I hope I got that right. I suppose if you asked Milo, he'd have more details. My brain has a nasty habit of throwing out details. Anyway... there you have it... Raspberry Silk.

I'm listening to "Breathe" on FM-Selfpit right now... it really blows me away. Milo was good at doing that... blowing me away with his song arrangements. It's too bad we couldn't get along.

I've been sticking to my diet well. The only hiccups have been that I forgot to eat veggies with my breakfast a couple of mornings. It's just so unnatural to eat veggies with milk and cereal. haha I don't think it hurt anything, but I hate when I simply forget to follow instructions.

So glad it's Friday...

It's not often you see this in the Austin weather forecast:

LilyDawg slept in the new bed last night! Yay!

I can sum up work today with one word. Bleh. Wait... that's not even a word.

Okay... so American Idol... I never get to vote because I never finish watching it until after the voting closes. I agreed with the general sentiments of the judges... the first and last singers were best. Diana and Fantasia. Man... they were working it! I liked that guy Matt, too, but when they did the review at the end, I agreed with Randy... his voice wasn't strong enough to beat out the girls. So when do we find out the results???

I had a hard time getting to sleep last night. I think it was partly the excitement of being in a new bed and partly because my allergies were acting up. I got to sleep eventually. I can't say my sleep was any different in the new bed... not deeper nor more restful. But when I got up (or should I say rolled out of bed) I wasn't stiff! Yay!

There will be no more "getting up." The bed's too high to "get up" from it! I didn't want a high bed because I like to be able to sit on the edge of my bed and do things. Play guitar. Put my shoes on. Stare. I guess I could still play guitar and stare, but it's not the same if my feet aren't firmly planted on the floor. The nice thing about having a high bed, though, is that it's easy on my knees when I do get up, err... roll out of bed.

So I'm very pleased.

LilyDawg, however, was not pleased last night. She alternated sleeping on the futon in the other bedroom and on the floor in the bathroom. Today, I threw a kink into things... I converted the futon from a bed to a love seat. She doesn't know what to think. This afternoon, though, I caught her laying on the new bed. hee hee Maybe she'll sleep with me tonight.